My say on Fifty Shade of Grey, the movie.
This is quite long winded so I apologise now (and for any grammar and spelling mistakes. I wrote this very fast)
OK so I finally got the chance to go see the fifty shades of grey movie. I heard so many good and bad things about the film, but I wanted to remain impartial, I wanted to keep an open mind. Bear in mind I have read the books and I knew what was going to happen. With that in mind, I was a little upset in the way the book portrayed the lifestyle. There were many flaws, but I still liked the love story. The kink scene would set of a whirl wind of emotions inside me, bringing back a series of good memories. So as I sat in my premier (yes, only the best for me lol) seat, with my backless, easy access for HIM, grey top and my hand resting dangerously close to HIS crotch, I waited. A little excited to see Jamie the big screen and how this film would pan out.
I’m going to break this review down in to three sections. The characters/actors, the movie and the BDSM. So first up, Dakota aka Ana Steel:
I won’t lie, I was one of many people out there who hated the fact that she was playing Ana. In mind she wasn’t what I imaged but then again, they were never going to find a person everyone was happy with. She looked a lot older than 23, she wasn’t small or curvy (that’s how I saw her) but again, I kept my mind open.
I have to say, she surprised me. in the whole movie she was my favourite, she played Ana very well, exactly how I saw Ana in her attitude. She was innocent, sweet and endearing. The gestured looks she gave him, to the biting of her lip. The silly little girl giggles, her nervous stutters and idiotic comments. I felt her love for Christian, she executed the emotion and passion so strongly that I felt it with her. I also have to say she was very brave to take on a role like that, to put herself in a vulnerable position like that when she knew she wouldn’t like the BDSM scenes, regardless to the fact that she wasn’t experience the real thing.
She definitely gets the thumbs up from me.
Okay, Jamie is pretty damn hot. He looks fucking sexy in those tight fitted suits and out of them also, but his character lacked that certain something. He didn’t pull the Dominate male role off. If he was my Dom I would not have surrendering my will to him, my legs would definitely not be quaking in my boots. If I’d met him I would probably be the more Dominate out of the two of us. I don’t know why this is, maybe it was because he felt uncomfortable around Dakota? Or maybe it was his bad experience with the lifestyle that turned him off the idea of inflicted pain on his co-star? I don’t know, I just wasn’t feeling it. I didn’t feel his passion for her, I did not feel the chemistry and his “need” to have her, as he so rightly stated. There was no lust, no strong emotions in those eyes, only emptiness.
Jamie honey, if you are going to do the next two movies you need to find your inner Christian Grey, because I’m really not feeling it.
Hhhhhmmm, where do I start? Honestly, it was boring. This won’t be a long detailed section on the movie because my biggest review will be on the BDSM.
I was excited at first, but as the movie progressed I found my attention span diminishing. Instead I had more fun with HIM and how his hand had sneakily found his way in to my top and was playing with my breast. Definitely a lot hot than the sex in that film. To me the film just felt rush and staggered. I know it’s difficult to get all of what was in the book on to the big screen, but I felt the films Divergent and The Hunger Games done a great job at it so why not fifty shades. Those story lines flowed and this didn’t. I think what didn’t help was the nonexistent narration from Ana. I might have liked it better had I heard what she was thinking like in the books. Without that, there wasn’t much of a storyline. At least when we heard her thoughts, you knew of the emotional rollercoaster she was going through and why she was going through it.
It wasn’t all bad, so I’m not going to sit here and slag the whole film off. The scene where they had their “business meeting” was pretty fucking hot and no sex was had. I guess I like the build up, the teasing and the taunting. they got that right with the D/s relationship. It is a Dom’s job to scene the change their sub’s, to notice when they are excited and aroused.
As a couple I personally didn’t think they worked. I think Jamie needs to chill out a bit and stop worrying about Dakota and what others may think, just go on with the role. Dakota got her whole body out, every last hairy bit of it, she didn’t like the pain inflicted on her but she got on with it, played the role as best she could and she did brilliantly.
Okay, now the BDSM:
I won’t lie; this was boring and also made me a little angry too, at one point.
Many people will think “here we go again, another kinkster moaning about the film” yes I am, but I will also say some good things on it too. Not many but some.
The people in the lifestyle will say “oh god, it makes us all look like we are fucked up” erm yes I suppose, but aren’t we all a little fucked up? I am, I have dad issues, I give my submissive to feel free because I am fed up with being in control of a life that has repeatedly (in the past more so then now) let me down, but since becoming a submissive I never felt more alive. BDSM took a fucked up me, someone that was struggling to figure who she was and what she wanted, and turned me sane. I personally think EL James maybe could have explained that Christian use to be fucked up and BDSM unleash something within him, something that made him feel good about himself, that this was who he was but in a good way and made him more comfortable and confident in life. Because it did, as much as we hate Mrs Robinson, she sorted him out to become a very successful man who was confident in himself. His issue were with his mother, not the lifestyle.
The BDSM did feel forced on to Ana, but then I felt this way when I read the book. You can’t make someone a submissive, they will know if they are or aren’t. I took me a long time to figure out that I was one. It’s very hard to explain, I knew I was different, but it took a friend to introduce me to the lifestyle for me to realise. I knew, deep down, all along I was a submissive. With that I felt it was pushed on to Ana and it shouldn’t have been.
Following on from that, there is a section at the end when Ana is upset and she states that she hates being hit just as much as Christian hates to be touched, and in the books she also says, on more than one occasion, that she doesn’t practically like being ordered around. Therefore in my eyes she is, without a shadow of a doubt, not a submissive or masochist. Don’t get me wrong, everyone has the potential to be kinky, but in the sense of what Christian was looking for from her, it was too much.
In the BDSM scenes, you can see Jamie has no clue what his doing and therefore the scene did not get me going, it didn’t seem natural. The only thing to get me going was recalling my own memories of the flogger and the riding crop. (ps, the flogger she touches when she first enters the red room of pain, is actually a cat o’nine tails) I have to say though that red room; oh my god!!!! I want that room BADLY!!! Hot stuff. Well done to the designer.
However, there was one part that had me fuming, the belting scene at the end. I have been belted and out of all the instruments I saw in that room, that is by far NOT the harshest. The cane is ten times more painful than a belt. Anyway, that’s not my point. My point being, only seconds before that scene she told him she hated the pain. They were both very upset and for that reason alone, he should have outright declined to show her “how bad it can be” (by the way… that’s actually not the harshest BDSM can be. Knife and blood play are harsher in my eyes) There is nothing wrong with either of those, if that’s what you like, but the belt to me is nothing. But then again I am hardcore lol. I suppose to someone like Ana, a virgin to BDMS, then yes it is extreme.
My sir used to say “don’t play angry” and this is very true. When your emotions are all over the place (this is for both sub and Dom) then you should not partake in kink. It is not health and could be dangerous. So that was the simmering point of my fury. Then he takes her in to the room and goes full whack (pun intended) on her. fury bubbling over now. As a Dom, he should have seen how upset she was, he knew she was very very new to BDSM and clearly didn’t like the pain so therefore she definitely wouldn’t be able to handle it (at this point, I was thinking ok two reason to straight out refuse to show her). He then doesn’t warm her up (this is a BDSM thing. He would warm the skin on her bottom to help with the impact of the belt so she doesn’t get hurt) and when she is in tears over the spanking bench, he continues on with a look of a mad man stretched across his face!!!! Really man!
She also should have used the safeword. After the first two blows of the belt she would have formed an opinion on whether she could have handle it straight away, so there was no need for her to carry on. He should have also checked in on her, to make sure she was ok.
Can I also note, no aftercare was mention. It was sorely lacking in the books and was completely missed in the movie. A D/s relationship is about trust and care, it is supposed to be fun for both the Dom and the sub. Therefore, it is the Dom’s job to look after his sub. When a sub experience extreme scenes of BDSM they are left feeling drained and in a subspace high from the endorphins roaring through their blood stream. The Sub will then experience what is called “drop” this is an intense feeling, similar to depression or a hangover. Their emotions are all over the place and therefore the Dom should care for her, cuddle her and let her (or him) know that they are there for them. This is a very important part to BDSM and is severally missed out.
This is where I was stewing in my seat and HIM looking sideways at me with a raised brow. I wanted to scream at the screen, I wanted to get up in front of everyone in that theatre and tell them that I have never met a Dom who would do that., that a true Dom would NEVER have done that to her.
I can also hear you saying “well, you read the books, then you should have known” yes I did and I felt the same way then, as I did watching the film. The difference being the film makes it more real and I guess I was silently hoped they would make it look better, maybe soften it a little and explain that the lifestyle is way better than the books, but instead the film made it look worst.
What I will say, some of the scenes in the room where she was cuffed and tied with rope were hot. I love rope and he did seem like he knew what he was doing with that rope, and that’s saying something coming from me. I am a massive fan of rope bondage, so much so that I have learnt Shibari (Japanese form of rope bondage) He did also look incredible hot in those rip jeans and I did like the way they showed the condom in the scenes, showing that you should be safe. This is not something you see often in films and I know people may think it killed the mood, but I didn’t think it did. It was done in a tasteful way and I give that the thumbs up also.
So there you have it. I could spend hours analysing this film but I won’t. I wasn’t a bad film, but it wasn’t great either. I do think people of the BDSM lifestyle have been made to look a little like we are psychos, but at the same time I am not going to threat over it. I know I am not and if anyone wants to know more about it I am always willing to talk about it. I say go in with an openmind on everything; don’t judge what you don’t know. Those that do judge aren’t worth wasting the time on.
I am a perfectly normally person, sane of mind and body, and that’s all that matters. I have loads of kinky friends and some that aren’t who love to hear my stories. They are the only ones that matter to me, not those dick heads who say its rape and abuse. I can tell you now, I have been a victim of sexual assault and I have witness abuse first hand and kink isn’t even remotely close to either of those.
BTW, HE stated the film was boring and that our kinky sex is way better lol
Anyway that’s my review. Say what you like about it, as long as its constructive and polite, but remember we all have our own opinions and we are entitle to them, so don’t try to change mine ok.
Ps. Rita Ora got a massive part in the film did she? Lol